Have you ever stopped to contemplate the multitude of personality types that surround you daily? The vast array of people with varying degrees of differences between them – there are physical differences that differentiate us from one another, as well as personality traits that characterize each one of us. What makes you, you? Ask your self this question – Who are you?
In response to this question, I might say, “I am a 50 year old wife, mother of one son who has passed away and dog mom to two rescue dogs, Isabella and Cairo.” But, is that really who I am? I don’t think it is. For me, the better answer would be, “I am a beautiful soul, full of life and love. I am a compassionate, sensitive, kind and nurturing being who finds peace in helping others.” My physical attributes or what I do in life are not who I am – they are not the real me. My physical body simply provides a temple in which my spirit resides. Think about it – that is what makes each of us unique – that is what provides all of our quirks that set us apart from one another. When I think about it that way, it sheds light on the fact that these are two separate entities – our physical body and our soul. So, what becomes of our soul or our spirit when our physical body ceases to exist?
Standing at the top of the stairs, Tyler appeared to be almost tangible. This didn’t feel like a dream. When he enveloped me in one of his big bear hugs, the tears began to spill from my eyes. “Geez Mom, stop crying. I am fine,” he said, hugging me tighter. Looking at him, I could see that he was thinner than I remembered and his hair was longer and little curls had started to form around his ears and at the nape of his neck. The smell of coffee wafted through the room, and I awoke with anticipation of what that first cup would taste like. As I began to descend the stairs, making my way to the kitchen, I suddenly came to a screeching halt – reminiscent of a freight train making impact with a brick wall. I had to sit down as the scenes from my “dream” the night before began flooding my mind. I had seen Tyler. I had spoken to Tyler. I had smelled the scent of Tyler, heard his heartbeat as he pulled me against his chest. Was this real? Was it a dream?
Although this was the first visit I had from Tyler, it wasn’t the last. He has visited me multiple times during my sleep over the last 7 years and has also presented himself as a beautiful butterfly on many occasions. It is these visits, various signs given, along with very private information shared with me by a psychic medium (information that only Tyler would know) that have led me to the knowledge that our spirits, our very unique souls, those which make us who we are, continue to exist in the universe. I believe that the spirits of our loved ones whom have passed on, find creative ways to let us know that they are surrounding us and that they can still see and hear us. Knowing this has changed the course of my grief. It has allowed me to free myself of the resentment and anger that were holding space in my grief and has allowed me to experience true joy alongside the ever-present sadness that comes with missing Tyler.
So, who is the real you? The real you is the essence of who you are – the unique qualities that encompass your physical body – and they will continue to exist even after your physical body is no longer present. Having this knowledge and believing it wholeheartedly, have led me to becoming a resilient griever and my hope is that it will help you in the same manner.